My comment :-D
1. About your outline: you should put the introduction para into the outline.
I feel to be impressed with the arrangement of your ideas
2. There are some grammar errors.
Nowadays, many people
spend a lot of time to earn money -->
spend time on doing sth. To them, money is the goal of their lives. It is reasonable because many of our favorite things require us to spend money
( not only favourite thing but also the essential things that need for our existence) . But --> however (more formal)there are many things which can not be bought by money. Surprising,-->
surprisingly they are the best things in our lives: enjoying natural, the wonderful memories with friends and family, and happiness.
First of all, there are many beautiful sceneries that we can enjoy without money. Walking on beach, and watching the sunrise are the most favorite things for me to relax. Climbing in a top mountain, and then enjoying the fresh air, seeing impressive scene are the wonderful things we can do without money. Listening to the beautiful songs of natural can make us feel very pleasant. There are nice memories which
result --> maintain/sustain after we enjoy the beauty of natural.
Secondly, spending time with our friends and family is one of the best things we can do without money. Happiness is sometime a simply thing when
we sit with -->have time together with our family or friends, talk some funny and laugh together. The best things are the things that we share with others. Walking in the rain, seeing a movie, playing together
is --> are really fun in our lives that we can not do if we are alone.
Thirdly, Money can make our lives better, but we can not use only money to achieve true happiness. Love is a good example to insulate it. Money can help us more attractive with a beautiful clothes or a luxurious car but a true love does not come from it. In fact, Love is
undescribable --> indescribable , no one can force another to love them. It is a reason why some people who marry only for money rarely have a happy ending.
In conclusion, money is necessary in our lives, but we can not use it to buy the best things. Life itself is the best thing that the God has given to us. If we learn the truly value of our lives, we can have happiness live
s. --> so many "life"